Monday, July 25, 2011

may i never be content


I'm tired, physically .. and sometimes emotionally as well. Early mornings see me trying to lift my heavy lids and when I finally have a stream of sight squeeze in, I see Joel sleeping so adorably beside me and all I want to do is go back to sleep and pretend it's a perfectly fuss free Sunday. SIGH.

Trainings have been thoroughly fruitful and though I'm so exhausted I knockout on 518 everytime, I know it's worth it. More than anything else, I'm happy to be doing what we are doing now. Happy to have such a chance to dance with Lum and Shauna on the same stage, admittedly, my ego suffers a beating at each session yet I grow in so many other ways. I haven't put so much heart in dancing for so long, not for the sake of a concert or to put a show together but really just a personal goal propelling me forward. A flame ignite. It's been ages since I've felt this way. It's been ages since I responded to the carrot dangling right before me rather than choose to succumb to a mundane existence.

2 more months till the end of this tiresome schedule, this loathesome schedule. Everyday I count down the days to the end of 9-6 in school , because there's so much more I want to do and this is the greatest hindrance. What I have to do is hindering what I want to do, but just as well, it's precisely just that that gets me pass each day.

I like this thirst, I like this thirst for hunger.
I'm happy now but I'm far from being content and just as well,
may I never be content.

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